my top 10 list

David Letterman being extorted for 2 million?

My top 10 List of things that make me go hmmmmmm:


10.) Will new evidence point to Dave sleeping with Paul the night his bandleader wrote "It's Raining Men," come out?

9.) Will Madonna now admit she slept with Dave the night she couldn't say the F word enough.

8.) Will Conan get any bright ideas?

7.) Will it be revealed a shih tzu had sex backstage with a poodle during a stupid pet tricks performance? Letterman covering up the birth of the shiht-poo. The puppy Max, now is in hiding in a Max shelter, founded by Max Weinberg.

6.) Will evidence show in paternity tests... Dave knocked up Sarah Palin's daughter?

5.) Will Ball State offer internships to fill World Wide Pants positions anymore?

4.) Did Bud Melman know about this? And is that why he left the show at 81? He was still in his prime!

3.) How late did Dave stay out after a Late Night?

2.) Why did Dave really enjoy those cigars so damn much? (can you say Clinton?)

1.) Did Ed Sullivan ever hav sex with his crew? Really big sheeeeew~

Note: A little known fact: The Beatles had sex with Sullivan's staff after their American debut in 1964. Some staff memebers say there were even some dancing bears in the room.

Some random Letterman trivia:

My Mensa from Sunday night~

Two actresses on Late Nite have called Dave an asshole. One was a witch in 'Witches of Eastwick,' and one was a witch in 'Bewitched' the movie! Name them!



ANSWER: Cher, Shirly MacLaine

Lititz~

I moved back to my hometown in June. Lititz is a quaint town in Lancaster County (pop. 41,554) I live within a fews steps of the square. The General Sutter Inn is just around the corner. General Sutter founded Sacramento, California. He was a resident of Lititz from 1871-1880, and is buried in the Moravian Church cemetery.

I can walk across the street to my bank. Down the street to the post office. My insurance company is across the hall from me. Lititz was founded in 1757 by the Moravians. At one time, you had to be a Moravian to live in Lititz. Now the composition is just white. (97.23%) I took a walk today and observed the history along Main. The Mueller House, a 1792 house offers a glimpse into the Moravian way of life. The Pretzel House, the oldest commercial bakery in the US, and the Wilbur Chocolate factory where Wilbur buds and chocolate sweets permeate thru the town's charm.

I pass by the Linden Hall, 1746, the oldest girls boarding school in the nation. They proudly display a sign proclaiming the "Highest SAT scores in the County."
The gift shops are brimming with antiques, along with trinkets from today. Tourists slowly make their way to each window's eye candy. Cafe chocolat features chocolate dipped strawberries in the window. It is fall and the leaves are starting to drop. Lititz is postcard perfect. Or...is it?

Today the Chief Operating officer of the Ambulance Fund was arrested for embezzling nearly half a million dollars of investments the association had made. He is in jail in lieu of the same amount of money in bail as he stole.

In 2005, a Mayoral candidate and church leader pulled out of the race because of inappropriate relations with a pre-teen.

A Warwick HS teacher was arrested in 2007 in a Blazer for having sex with one of his students. A music teacher and band director, he was part of a HS that had a long proud tradition of marching band. I was a part of that in the 70's and I was sad to hear that. Talk about marching to the sound of a different drummer!

In 2008, an Assistant Band director was arrested. Same tune.

A Warwick basketball coach, not long before those incidences was arrested. Also, Foul on the play. I think it is called crossing the line.

Last year, shot glasses were given out to students at my Warwick HS as prom party favors.


"In my little town
I grew up believ--ing
God keeps his eye on us all
And he used to lean upon me
As I pledged allegiance to the wall
Lord I recall
My little town"

paul simon

Where has my little town gone?

random thoughts on recent stuff~

....I hate golf. Played over the weekend in a scramble. I was busy most the time scrambling in the brush for balls. I lost five balls, a glove, four tees, and my patience for ANY golf etiquette. I did not yell four, because my ball did not come close to hitting anything but the trees. I chose other four letter f words.
My handicap was I had not swung a club in 10 years. A.A. Milne who wrote Winnie the Pooh once wrote: "Golf is so popular, simply because it is the best game in the world to be bad." I was bad. Soooooooooooooo bad!

....I watched some of the VMA's....the MJ tribute for Michael was great featuring Janet. A Jackson concert featuring Janet singing Michael's part would be cool~

....Kanye West's interruption of Taylor Swift moments was still yet another embarrassment for the not so Sharpest tongue in the West. This is the same guy during Katrina that commented that George Bush doesn't care about black people. Well, apparently , Kanye you don't care about 19 year old white country singers. Incidentally, I still have not heard a Kanye song I like. When Jay Leno asked Kanye what his mother would have thought about his Beyonce behavior, I thought he was going to cry like a baby. Way to 'dig' for a 'gold'en question Jay, throw on a lil dead mom guilt, works every time~ ! Even Obama got into the act by calling Kanye a Jackass. You go Obama~!


....I caught a bit of the Oprah interview with Whitney. The 'Stand by Your Man' thing just doesn't cut it with me. This isn't the Patsy Cline era. Patsy sang about 'sometimes it's hard to be a woman' and went down in a tragic plane crash. Whitney crashed and burned on her own, soon after singing 'I'm Every Woman.' She always had good people around her. Eight years ago when crack was whack, the people were there. She chose to hole up with Bobby. She waited with baited breath to inhale daily. She had the 'greatest love of all'... the drugs, and liked it. Looked to me like she had a new set of pearly white teeth too~! (Where do broken teeth go?) When Oprah questioned her about how she took the drugs... she looked at Oprah like "Wat?"... "You don't know? Well lemme explain it....." So hard for me to feel sorry for people that are surrounded by bodyguards, million dollar bank accounts, and choose to feed dealers families. As far as Bobby? She married a man who had kids with other women, was known for not being able to "Cool It Now" (or then) with other women. Did Whitney really think he was a good guy? A good New Edition to her life? He is currently in back child support payments of $45,000 to his array of kids. Gee, where has that child support gone?...To support other selfish habits perhaps? 'Don't Be Cruel' Bobby...you sucked Whitney dry, so grow up and take care of your kids. It's your perogative, but grow up!!!! Get over yourself. You had one #1 song.
You literally stopped a woman from flourishing. Damn Shame.

9/11 and other tragic numbers

Total number killed in attacks (official figure as of 9/5/02): 2,819

•Number of firefighters and paramedics killed: 343

•Number of NYPD officers: 23

•Number of Port Authority police officers: 37

•Number of WTC companies that lost people: 60

•Number of employees who died in Tower One: 1,402

•Number of employees who died in Tower Two: 614

•Number of employees lost at Cantor Fitzgerald: 658

•Number of U.S. troops killed in Operation Enduring Freedom: 22

•Number of nations whose citizens were killed in attacks: 115

•Ratio of men to women who died: 3:1

•Age of the greatest number who died: between 35 and 39

•Bodies found "intact": 289

•Body parts found: 19,858

•Number of families who got no remains: 1,717

•Estimated units of blood donated to the New York Blood Center: 36,000

•Total units of donated blood actually used: 258

•Number of people who lost a spouse or partner in the attacks: 1,609

•Estimated number of children who lost a parent: 3,051

•Percentage of Americans who knew someone hurt or killed in the attacks: 20

•FDNY retirements, January–July 2001: 274

•FDNY retirements, January–July 2002: 661

•Number of firefighters on leave for respiratory problems by January 2002: 300

•Number of funerals attended by Rudy Giuliani in 2001: 200

•Number of FDNY vehicles destroyed: 98

•Tons of debris removed from site: 1,506,124

•Days fires continued to burn after the attack: 99

•Jobs lost in New York owing to the attacks: 146,100

•Days the New York Stock Exchange was closed: 6

•Point drop in the Dow Jones industrial average when the NYSE reopened: 684.81

•Days after 9/11 that the U.S. began bombing Afghanistan: 26

•Total number of hate crimes reported to the Council on American-Islamic Relations nationwide since 9/11: 1,714

•Economic loss to New York in month following the attacks: $105 billion

•Estimated cost of cleanup: $600 million

•Total FEMA money spent on the emergency: $970 million

•Estimated amount donated to 9/11 charities: $1.4 billion

•Estimated amount of insurance paid worldwide related to 9/11: $40.2 billion

•Estimated amount of money needed to overhaul lower-Manhattan subways: $7.5 billion

•Amount of money recently granted by U.S. government to overhaul lower-Manhattan subways: $4.55 billion

•Estimated amount of money raised for funds dedicated to NYPD and FDNY families: $500 million

•Percentage of total charity money raised going to FDNY and NYPD families: 25

•Average benefit already received by each FDNY and NYPD widow: $1 million

•Percentage increase in law-school applications from 2001 to 2002: 17.9

•Percentage increase in Peace Corps applications from 2001 to 2002: 40

•Percentage increase in CIA applications from 2001 to 2002: 50

•Number of songs Clear Channel Radio considered "inappropriate" to play after 9/11: 150

•Number of mentions of 9/11 at the Oscars: 26

•Apartments in lower Manhattan eligible for asbestos cleanup: 30,000

•Number of apartments whose residents have requested cleanup and testing: 4,110

•Number of Americans who changed their 2001 holiday-travel plans from plane to train or car: 1.4 million

•Estimated number of New Yorkers suffering from post-traumatic-stress disorder as a result of 9/11: 422,000

Copyright © 2009, New York Media LLC. All Rights Reserved.

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In all, $12 billion in cash, weighing 363 tonnes, was flown into Iraq. On
December 12, 2003, one single flight to Iraq contained $1.5 billion in cash, the largest single Federal Reserve payout in US history, according to Henry Waxman, the Democrat congressman who is investigated the funding.

The US has so far spent $226 billion on the Iraq war. The CPA was allocated $38 billion in US and Iraqi funds, and spent $19.7 billion of UN-administered Iraqi oil money.

9/11 09
Number of uninsured in USA 46.3 million
Isn't time we take care of ours?

You lie~!!!

Senator Joe Wilson of South Carolina boldly called President Obama on his health care comments. "You Lie!!!" he blurted out! Pelosi and Biden looked at him like he had just pulled a smoking gun on the President. I can barely sit through a speech to Congress with the grunts and groans, the standing o's, the lap signs, the stone faces, and the lack of partisan politeness. I know this is not 17th century France here, but these are men in suits acting like bullies to the pulpit. After all, Obama is the President, so let him have his moment to express his views. The camera will be on your face soon enough after Fox airs all the rebukes and rebuttals.

A lie is to state something that one knows to be false or that one has not reasonably ascertained to be true with the intention that it be taken for the truth by oneself or someone else. Maybe the President when addressing congress should be hooked up to a polygraph. Sort of like that Fox game show 'Moment of Truth'. We have the studio audience, a star, and a big national audience. Bells and whistles could sound out everytime a lie was detected. I always have regarded politicians as To tell the truth paneleists anyway...My name is....my name is....my name is...cause from one day to next you never know what you're going to get. Reminds me of a line in Forest Gump: "Oh, yes sir. Bit me right in the buttocks. They said it was a million dollar wound, but the army must keep that money 'cause I still haven't seen a nickel of that million dollars. "


So many lies. Bold faced, White, Contextual, Perjury, Fabrication.....
Lies are something everyone has done. People generally want words of appeasement Sometimes the truth of matters is far too hard to roll off our tongues.. We lie to kids early~! Tell them Santa and Rudolph will eat the cookies, babies come from storks, and it is Wheaties that makes that player hit the home runs.

Here are a few lies in pop culture~

Jim Carey in 'Liar Liar' not being able to lie for 24 hours (should try it sometime!)

Pinnochio and that nose...(our noses don't grow, but our eyes tell tales)

In 1985 Max Headroom commented you can always tell when a politician is lying...their lips move~~~!!! Now that is truthiness at best. In a chamber full of state heads, lies run rampent.

Shakira---"Hips Don't lie."


A Quick Quiz on Lies:

1.) The novel "The Liar" was whose first book? Adrian is the liar.

2.) In Liar Liar, Jim Carey's character says, 'How Could I Forget?' to Mrs. Cole and Kevin Falk outside the courtroom. He says that same line to Chase
Meridian played by Nicole Kidman in what film?

3.) Lies was the first song to feature solos from all four women in 1990 by what girl group?

4.) Who did the tune "I'd lie to you and thats the truth?"

5.) What 2008 spy film had the promo line: Trust No One. Decieve Everyone.

ANSWERS:

1.) STEPHEN FRY
2.) BATMAN FOREVER
3.) EN VOGUE
4.) MEATLOAF
5.) BODY OF LIES

ARE MY EMAILS TRYING TO SAY SOMETHING?

I was doing some spring email cleaning, when I noticed my demographic must be on the cusp of mid-life crisis #2, and hovering around toxic levels of my body in decline.

Here are my most recent emails:

Viagra or Cialis Free Trial!
Viagra Free!
Cialis Free!
Enlarge It (because bigger is better)
Hoveround (get your life back)
Anti- Aging Miracle (fountain of youth in a bottle)
Your old Ex wants to reunite~!
Know when your time is up with Death Clock


And...thank God I was recently sent a wink, a hug, a kiss, a tag, a nudge, a pet, and a martini, by people I don't even know on various social networking sites.
Keeps my chin up!!!


Here is a parody of Chubawamba's Tubthumping I wrote while digesting all this!

I get knocked down, but I get up again,
You're never goin' to keep me down,


Kissing the night away
Kissing the night away

He takes a viagra pill
He takes a cialis pill
He take a Sidenafil
He takes a tadalafil

He sings the songs that remind him
of the up times
He sings a song that reminds him of the down times.

or...how bout.......this (original poem of junk mail over-load)


52 junk mails, bought into them all....
Now I'm all better, never am dull~

Got me a Hoveround from the real Tom Kruse,
I still can walk, but what is there to lose?
I go to the mall and run over the walkers,
Never mind those mallrat dwellling gawkers....

I got me Cialis and a supply of Viagra,
Now I'm flowing like the falls of Niagara...

Bought me Enlarge pills and wrinkle cream,
Got me a timeshare (Boise), livin' the dream!

Got me a job...500 dollars a week!
I can stay at home-- maintaining physique!

Got Mother's Day Flowers for under 20 bucks,
Got there today, oh well, that really sucks....

Got a Citizen Grant, so I can take what's mine
Got an Obama plate, auto pen signed!

Got a discount on meds for all the depression,
And bought a foreclosed home, due to recesssion.

Bought some life insurance at premium rates,
Got plenty of Hyundai cash in rebates.

I lowered my blood sugar with one easy click....
Bought Rachel Ray cookware, (love that pick!)

Got some Hydroxycut, mis-took for cookies,
Got a pamphlet called 'Weight Loss for Rookies...'
Bought a Free Google Kit and an Ebay course,
If your life needs an upgrade, consider the source....

Check that junk mail, it's just what you need~
It's meant for your good, so next time..... do read~

CONCERT SCENES

CONCERTS I'VE SEEN.................(.OFF TOP OF MY HEAD...WILL ADD MORE AS THEY COME TO ME~ )

BLUES BROTHERS
JACKSON FIVE
BLOOD, SWEAT, AND TEARS
SISTER SLEDGE
POINTER SISTERS
LIONEL RICHIE
GREG KIHN BAND
RICK SPRINGFIELD
THE CARS
WANG CHUNG
KOOL AND THE GANG
LOVERBOY
HARRY CHAPIN
BILLY JOEL
ELTON JOHN
BARRY MANILOW
J GEILS BAND
EDDIE MONEY
TODD RUNDGREN
SUGAR HILL GANG
JAMES TAYLOR
JOHN COUGAR MELLENCAMP
SAVAGE GARDEN
WEIRD AL
DONNY OSMOND
THREE DOG NIGHT
WAYNE NEWTON
TONY ORLANDO AND DAWN
MANHATTAN TRANSFER
OAK RIDGE BOYS
ROBERTA FLACK
HELEN REDDY
KC AND THE SUNSHINE BAND
ROB BASE AND EZ ROCK
TON LOC
BEACH BOYS
BLESSID UNION OF SOULS
DAVY JONES
GLADYS KNIGHT (MINUS PIPS)
THE BLUE NOTES
CHICAGO
HALL AND OATES
MEN AT WORK
BLUES TRAVELER
NO MERCY
LFO
GIN BLOSSOMS
EDWIN MCCAIN
TOWER OF POWER
MAYNARD FERGUSON
BACON BROTHERS
DON MCLEAN